A lost thought
by The Death Of Sunshine
Summary: Rachel gets in a car crash and wakes up without any memory. She soon learns that she has a boyfriend named Octavian, but he seems angry and distasteful towards her despite all the warm memories of them that slowly return to Rachel. Can Rachel ever regain her memory and bring things back together with Octavian, or will she never be the same person he once loved.
1. Chapter 1

I wake up to nothing but white, that's all I see and all I can think. That is until the questions begin to bubble. Where am I? What am I doing here? Who am I with? Why does my head hurt? What's this slight sting in the arch of my left elbow?

Who am I?

Rachel, my name is Rachel. and I'm in a hospital. Why? And why can't I remember? I just groan out of frustration and pain. Suddenly something moves. I slowly sit up and look to see a young man with pale blonde hair and ice blue eyes sitting in a chair next to me. Staring at me.

"Hello." I mutter. He grins and stands up to walk over to me. He takes my hand. I know that touch and I know those eyes. I know him. He opens his mouth to speeak but the door flies open.

"Shes up!" I blonde curly haired girl with shape grey eyes and a lab coat comes in. I know her to. She smiles broadly at me. She glances over to the guy. "Thanks for telling me icy." His grin drops and he scowls at her, but the light in his eyes don't fade when he returns his gaze to me.

"I just woke up." I tell her. The girl nods, jotting something down on the chart she's holding. "So are you like my doctor or something?" the girl freezes and the light in the guys eyes vanishes as he tenses. Just then a man in a white coat like the girls and hands her a file, she looks through in urgently before looking over to the guy at my side with sad eyes and nods to the door.

"Can we step outside, I need to talk to up for a minute." She voice is soft and slow like she were talking to an injured child. He looks back at me for a moment with a look full of thought but no light before nodding and walking away. I still can't recall his name and its killing me, just like the need to know what was in that file that's so important. And who is that girl and why did they both tense when I asked if she was my doctor. I knew her, she could be my doctor, I can know my doctor can't I?

They both stepped outside and I strained be here them but nothing came out of the white noises coming from everything around them. All I could do was watch them through the glass window. She was telling him something. He looked at her like she just telling him his mom died or something until He he seemed to snap at her and began to get angry, gesturing to my through the window without looking at me. They must be talking about me.

Finally they come back into the room. The guy is still fuming as refuses to look at me and slumps in the chair he was in before, glaring into the distance.

"Rachel, I'm just going to lay the facts out for you. You were in a car crash, we put you in a coma to allow your body to heal its self without interruption. You have made a full recovery... except for your memory." The girl tells me. The guy snorts from were he stills.

"Yeah, that sounds like a full recovery." My mind snaps at the sound of his voice, I know him. I know him, he's important to me.

"I know you, I remember you" I telling him. He snorts again and rolls his eyes before looking at me with bored eyes.

"What's my name than?" He asks. I'm confused, before he talked to the girl outside he seemed happy that I was awake.

"Octavian." I answer before I even realize that I know the answer. Light flickers in his eyes for a moment before he shakes his head and the light is crushed.

"how'd we meet? What's my status in your life? What's my favorite colour?" He asks. My mind races only to find no answers. I take a deep breathe as I look away fron him, looking at the foot of my bed trying as hard as I can to remember. "See? You don't remember me." He scowls at the wall. I glance at him again pleadingly hoping studying his features can help me remember. As I look at his features I get a fuzzy feeling inside ans blurs of memories to blurred to know what's going on but I know from the feeling I get that most of them are good. My brain strives to remember what made me feel so good. but nothing happens. I almost cry.

Instead I bury head into my fore arms and bend over into my lap and grunt."What's wrong with me?" I grunt out at them. I look up at The girl, my eyes starting to mist. "Why can't I remember?"

"Like I said, your memory is the only thing that came out unclear. You were in a car crash and we put you a coma for just ocver a month. Your long tem memory is fried but You should regain it over time. Know can you tell my your name?" The girl asked.

"Rachel Dare." I answer. She nods with a smile.

"Good. Can you remember who I am?" She asks. I study her up and down for a good minute and a half before it clicks.

"You're Annabeth, you're my best friend." I tell her with a smile. She smiles widely.

"Yes! See! Your already remembering."

"And your a doctor?" I guess.

"Close, I'm I cyclogest. They brought be in when they saw that your brain may not have made a full recovery as fast as the rest of your body." I nod.

She than pulls out a flash card with cubes on it. "I know this is childish but can you tell me how many cubes are on this card?"She asks. Suddenly Octavian stands up.

"Look, I really don't have the paisans to teach her how to cont to four all over again so I'm going to go home well you teach her shit like that." He says before walking to the door. Before he leaves I speak up.

"One, two, three, four. Looks like I don't need your help." I call after him. He yanks open the door and storms out, slamming the door behind him. I wince. I look to Annabeth. One of his questions still linger in my mind.

"What is his status in my life?"I ask. Annabeth gives me a sad look, like she's sorry I don't know.

"He's your boyfriend."


	2. Chapter 2

I stare at her. Octavian... that asshole... is my boyfriend?

I blink a few times. "Wow... well, That's odd," I mutter. "And for some reason not that surprising." I add in my mind. Annabeth nods. I wipe my hands over my face and sigh. "Could you... can you please call him back in?" I mutter as I reach for the glass of water I see on my bed side. Annabeth nods and steps out for a minute. When she comes back in her lips are pursed.

"He already left. Look, I'm going to call Percy and tell him you're up." I remember that name.

"He's that guy with black hair, its really messy, and green eyes... and his dad... I don't remember that but his dad's important, and so s your mom." Annabeth nods.

"We'll get into that later."She tells me. I suddenly think back to when she first came in.

"Why did you call Octavian Icy?" I ask. Annabeth laughed as she pulled out her phone.

"Your brain is all over the place right now, that's understandable. Its just a nick name we came up with for you two, 'fire and ice' you know because you two are so different and also because of his icy blue eyes and pale skin and your..." She trails off giggling. I'm confused.

"My what?" That's when I realize, I have no idea what I look like. Well I obviously the traits of fire. Annabeth must understand my confusion because she grabs me a mirror as she brings the phone to her ear. I look into the mirror. Wow. I have curly wild fire read hair, my upper cheeks and nose are riddled with freckles. My lips are bright red, my eyes are emerald green and almost look like they could glow if you turned off the lights.

I look down at my body, my frame is very similar to Annabeth's, curved nicely and fit, only I seemed slimmer and not quiet as athletic. probably from the coma. I can only imagine what having nothing but iv drip and what ever else they gave me for over a month could do to a body. I had the slightest of tans, not nearly as nice as Annabeth's tan, but like with the Iv drip, I've been lying in bed for over a month, I can't imagine I got much sun.

Annabeth leaves the room again just as she says hello to Percy on the phone. so I sit there thinking, trying to remember more of my life and I wont lie, I'm really focusing on remembering Octavian. After about ten minutes the door opens again, but to my surprise Annabeth doesn't come in, but Octavian does.

He doesn't look at me again as he takes his seat. "You asked for me?" He grumbled.

"I thought you left." I mutter nervous of his presence.

"I tried to, but I barely got off the the property when blondie called me." He told me.

"Annabeth." I correct him on point. He glances at me, his eyes watchful.

"Old habits truly do die hard." He muttered under his breath. I just ignore him, already getting tried of asking questions.

"So... we're a couple?" Octavian's eyes harden.

"No, we're not." I'm taken back by this.

"What? Did we get in a fight before the accident or something?" I ask.

"No, I'm breaking up with you right now." My eyes widen. Why the hell is he doing this? Before he talked to Annabeth in the hall he seemed so caring and happy.

"Wow... classy." I mutter looking away. He glares at my comment.

"I'm not dating someone that doesn't even remember me." He growls. I look at him for a moment and our eyes lock into a gaze. Slowly I see his cold glare melt away when I feel a flash go off in my mind as a memory plays in my mind.

Its as if I'm watching the same thing again only this time its sunny, we're in a different building that seems more like the frame of a building without walls and only poles holding it up. He's closer and wearing a purple t shirt. only in the memory he's slightly younger and he slowly begins to grin at me.

But what I'm seeing right now is his gaze suddenly hardening again as scowls and looks away. I look down at my hands. "I- I just remembered something." I mutter. He looks at me again with sudden interest.

"Tell me." He demands almost excitedly. I tell him and his eyes fall and he leans back. "Not much of a memory." He mutters. I look out the window that gives me a view of the cloudy sky and buildings around the hospital.

"At least its something." I mutter. Suddenly the door bursts open. I look over to see a grinning Percy at the door.

"Rachel!" He cries before rushing over to me and hugging me closely. I smile and hug him back.

"Hi." I mutter. He pulls back and stands there grinning.

"Do you know who I am?" He asks. My smile drifts, not liking the fact that he asked that.

"Yes." I tell him. He smiles wider.

"Great. So hows the happy couple?" He asks, glancing over his shoulder at Octavian only to see him frowning up at Percy. He looks back at me looking uneasy. "Obviously not well." He mutters quietly. Octavian snorts.

Annabeth comes back in with another person that looks to be a doctor. "Okay, sense your healed and able to think clearly with your personal logic in place, we're going to be discharging you, Rachel." The doctor tells me. I sit straight up and panic slightly.

"Wait what? Where am I going to go?" I demand.

"With me." Octavian answered. I look over to him.

"Why you?" I almost snap at him. He doesn't glare, he just looks at me, I swear I saw the smallest sadness in his eyes as he looked at me.

"Because we live together." He muttered. I look down, the sadness in his eyes getting the best of me.

"Oh, I'm sorry... I- I didn't-"

"Remember. I know." He glares at the wall to his side. I want to tell him different, but I really don't want to lie. I think I'm probably bad at it. Or maybe I'm just one of those people who could lie through murder but just choose not to because they want to believe that they're better than that. I hope I'm that, but the first one sound easier.

I get so caught up in that thought. Maybe a lot of things are like that, its just easier to be bad at something rather have to deal with a complicated alternative. God I hope not, if so I think I'm going to be bad a a lot of stuff.

I look up to see that even though I've stopped participating, the world has continued. Annabeth was gone, Octavian was talking to the doctor and Percy was walking around playing with a flower. I smile. "Where did that flower come from?" I ask him. He looks up at me with a look on his face that someone gives you when you know they only realized you were talking to them on the last word because they were so lost in their own world. I almost want to laugh when Percy does it, I can easily see why I have him as a friend, he just seems so playful.

He smiles at me. "Oh, well I kinda stole it from a new mother. Here" He hands it to me and I laugh.

"Nice one Seaweed brain, stealing from a woman who just pushed out a small watermelon." Annabeth says well coming back in. She has a pile of clothes in her arms and hands them to me. I smile and thank her.

I swing my legs over the side of the bed when I realize just how exposing a hospital gown is and whip my head out me shoulder and look at the others. "Don't look at my ass when I stand up." I demand. Percy and the doctor grin but glare at them to show that I'm not joking. I glance to Octavian who is staring at me with an unreadable expression. I look back and stand up, the first thing I heard in Percy.

"Hey Octavian, You heard her, no peaking." I whip around in an instant to see Percy laughing his ass off and Octavian glaring at him.

"Grow the fuck up Jackson." Octavian growls at Percy. I feel my cheeks warm up before looking away and rushing for the bathroom. I change quickly and come out.

I'm discharged quickly and before I know it I'm saying good bye to Annabeth and Percy and in a car with Octavian all alone. I feel nerves. I hate the tension so I turn on the ratio. A indie rock song plays. I listen for a bit before I realize I love the song.

"I love this song, who is it?" I ask excitedly. I'm surprised when I see Octavian smile. "What?" I ask shocked. I shakes his head.

"I knew you loved these guys, I knew it!" He grins at me until he realizes I have no idea what he's talking about but it sound familiar. "Sorry, its just a running argument we used to have, this is my favorite band imagine dragons, I would always say how great they were well you would complain and say that they were Apollo's punishment to society for the shit they've created on their own. Only now, this shit was placed in the greatest music genera, no scratch that, the greatest genera period; indie. Its hilarious how you and I went at each other over it." I smile as he tells me. Another flash hits me and I have another memory. Of me and him, in the car arguing over the band. be no matter how mean we were, after ever retort we would laugh and smile.

I smile at Octavian. "I remember, well at least one of the arguments. Oh god." He smiles wider until something invisible hits his eyes and the light fades and his smile melts away.

"Yeah, one of them." He mutters before driving on in silence. The song ends and I look down at my hands feeling guilty. We eventually stop in front of an apartment building. Octavian leads me in and we walk up three flights of stairs, we walk down a hall and stop at a door that says C13. Octavian shuffles with some keys before opening the door.

"Welcome." He mutters dryly


	3. Chapter 3

I walk around the apartment. From the door way, a small kitchen is to left and a slightly larger living room to the right. A small walk way is in between them, leading down to a forked hallway leading both left and versus Doors. I walk into the Living room and sit down on the couch.

I look over my shoulder to Octavian who was pulling something out of the fridge. He walls over to me with a beer in his hand. I feel slightly repulsed when he sits down heavily beside me and begins to chug the beer. He drinks about half of it before looking at me, he eyes slightly more hazed as the alcohol takes affect.

"So, this is our apartment. Your room is the last door on the right." He points down the hall and I nod. "And the bathroom is the first door in the left. Make yourself at home I mean after all you are at home."

"Whet are you sleeping?" I ask. He glances at me before sitting up and grabbing the TV remote.

"On the couch." He tells me as he sits back down. I look at him confused. I glance over to the first room on the right.

"what about that room?" I ask.

"that's your art studio." He tells me. I look back at him interested. A smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. "yeah, that's what you do for a living. Your an artist," I smile broadly.

"that's awesome, am I any good?" I ask with a grin. He shrugs.

"I think your amazing, but that's just me." I blush at his comment. I glance over at the bathroom.

"Um, can I go take a shower?" I ask. he looks at me like the answer is obvious and i was crazy to ask.

"Yeah." He says in a tone that matches the look on his face. I walk over to the bathroom. I strip quickly and step into the shower. I like the feeling of water rushing down my spine. I wash my skin and hair. When I finish I step out and wrapped a towel around me. I walk out of the bathroom with a small smile on my face. But it fades away when I see Octavian's eyes glued to my body. His eyes wondering to my legs, I blush and wave like a moron. His eyes snap up to my eyes.

"Annabeth, Percy and a couple others are coming over for dinner. They'll be here by six." He tells me.

"What time is it?" I ask.

"5:00" I tells me looking back at the TV. I nod and walk down to my room, passing Octavian as I do, when I pass I can feel his eyes on me again. I walk into my room and get dressed into a white tank top and blue jeans splattered in paint.

I walk out of my room and into the kitchen, hungry. I open the fridge. I pull out a bowl of strawberries wrapped in a damp paper towel. I sit at the three chaired table and eat the strawberries. I look over to the living room and watch the show that's playing.

Octavian walks out of the bathroom, when he sees me he sits down across from me but says nothing, only taking a strawberry for himself and watching the show with me. We chew on strawberries together in silence until the show ends and the next starts. I feel comfortable just being here with Octavian, it feels familiar.

I find myself staring at his face, he's quiet handsome in a way, his pale skin matches his pale eyes and hair, his pale eyelashes are barely seen by the reflection they make of the light above us. His lips fill my stomach with flutters. I blush knowing why. I look back at the Tv to distract myself

"Rachel?" Octavian breaks the silences between us. I glance over to him, he's studying his strawberry. The look on his face is familiar, a good familiar.

"Yes?" I reply. He glances up to meet my gaze.

"I'm glad that your okay." He mutters. I breathe catches at his words. I look down at the table.

"Why are you telling me this now?" I mutter.

"Because now is when I'm ready to say it." He grumbles. I look up again and study him. His body looks to be in between tense and relaxed, like he didn't know how to feel.

"Your not very open with feelings, are you?" I ask. He snorts.

"How could you tell?" He asks sarcastically.

I shrug. "Just a guess." A playful grin playing on my lips. He rolls his eyes. I study him again. How on earth could I actually have actually dated this man before me? He has little appeal to me, but at the same time I can't help but feel safe with him. I just think its from my subconscious. But still, how did he burn the feeling of safety into my subconscious? That was the first nice thing he's said to me sense I woke up from coma.

Before I can do anything stupid and ask him about it there's a knock at the door. Octavian stands up and gets it. A rush of bodies flow through the door. Annabeth and Percy are the only ones I recognize at first. But when a short Latino guy with elf like traits walks up to me and crushes me in a hug I quickly say. "Hey Leo" He pulls back and grins brightly

"She remembers me!" He glances over to some of the other people, mainly a pretty brown haired native girl and a blonde guy that has a similar build to Percy "Ha, told you! I'm so memorable it hurts!" I laugh at Leo, I remember him enough to know that he's... Leo.

I look to the others, the two that Leo were talking to and three others stood in front of me. "Hi... Um..." I hate myself for not remembering them, my brain is tired of working and I just wanted to walk into my room and sleep.

"Hi, I'm Piper." The pretty native girl told me with a easy smile. I nod. I learn the the guy beside her is Jason, the three others were Katie, Kayla and Will. And Travis was getting pizza.

We talk and I also learn that Travis, Katie and I are all working on a big art project and are like an art team whenever we're not doing solo work. Right know our art project is the walls of a youths building, in side and out.

Kayla, Jason and I take collage classes together.I work part time at a cafe with Piper. Will was related to Octavian and was a DJ at a club and worked on his own remixes. Percy is a gym teacher and Leo's a mechanic and... I'm just friends with them.

I have a good time hanging out with these people, their all nice. I'm now sitting in the living room eating pizza and watching a movie with all of the them. No one's really watching the movie, we just talk over it and laugh loudly.

"So wait, I'm confused, we're all about 20-23, so how the hell is Percy a teacher and Annabeth a cyclogest?" I ask laughing lightly from the random remark I heard a moment before. Annabeth shrugged,

"We lied about our age in high school." She tells me. I arch an eyebrow.

"Okay... and people bought it? Society is bent." I mutter. Travis laughs at me.

"It help that we're demigo-" Suddenly Annabeth slapped him in the back of the head.

"Shut up, she didn't remember that part you moron."

"Remember what?" I ask. Octavian sighs from where he is on the couch. He stands and walks over to me. He holds out his hand.

"We need to talk." He mutters. I hesitantly take his hand and stand up at his side.I glance to Annabeth. She's smiling sweetly to me. Octavian pulls me away from the group and over to my room. He closes the door behind us. He looks back at me and breaths in deep. "Okay, well..."He goes on and explains to me that the Greek and roman gods are real and everyone currently in the apartment aside from me, is a descendant of those gods. Everyone aside from him and Jason are Greek and everyone aside from Octavian is a direct child of a god well Octavian is only the son of a child of Apollo.

I nod as it all sinks in and a I feel calmed at the fact that I remember this. I smile up at him and tell him I remember, and I do. I remember that I can see through the mist, There's a camp I think, no two camps. I continue to strain for more information. I sit on the bed and cover my face with my hands.

"Crap, I'm tired!" I groan. I look up to see Octavian with the slightest smile tug at the corner of his mouth again. "When are these guys going?" I ask. "Not to be rude." He nods in understanding.

"I don't imagine they'll stay to much longer." He tells me. I nod and stand up. But before I reach the door he stops me. "Rachel," he mutters.

"Yes?" I reply. He looks conflicted before shaking his head.

"Nothing." He mutters. I look him up and down before I know whats happening my emotions pull me forward. I wrap my arms around his upper body, hugging him tightly. He stands there for a moment before wrapping his arms around me as well. My chin is resting on his should, causing my head to tilt back. I smile to myself. He's so tall. I turn my head to his ear.

"Thank you for telling me in private." I whisper to him. He just nodded. We walk back out and soon, like Octavian predicted. Everyone aside from Annabeth and Percy were gone. We sat at the kitchen table, Percy the only one standing as he drank one of Octavian's beers.

"So, your memory will return at its own rate, don't worry about the pace, everyone heals differently. But in the mean time, I think it would be good if you both kept a journal." Annabeth told us.

"Why both of us?" Octavian asks with a frown. Annabeth glanced over to him.

"So Rachel can right down the memories she gains and so you can measure her progress from where you stand. Don't worry, its not going to be read by anyone else, just see it as a guide, if you write down this whole progress and how it works it could help in the future and we could maybe even come up with a memory exercise based on the things you write down. And don't call me crazy, this has worked with many others. This one boy, no for that fifteen, he hit in the head by a falling rock in a canyon, he didn't remember a thing, he and his family and friends and teachers, basically everyone around him, wrote down in a journal, writing about his progress on remembering things. after two months they all compared notes and came up with an exercise to help him. Three years later, he made a full recovery." Annabeth told him.

I find the story about the boy fascinating, I want to ask Annabeth more about it but she's moving on to the next thing, grabbing two journals from her bag and handing them to Octavian and I.

Mine is a blank white hard cover. Octavian's the same. They're quite boring. I open the book and flipped through the blank lined pages. Suddenly a plastic package lands in front of me with dozens of colorful sharpies. I glance up at Annabeth. She smiles. "Make it your own." She tells me. I grin up at her.

Octavian pushes the journal away. "I'm not writing down my feelings and bullshit just because you think it'll gain her memories back. They can come back on their own." He growls.

Percy glares at him from where he's standing at the side. "Three months ago you told me that half of the things you do, you do to help Rachel and you would expect nothing less of yourself. What the hell happened to that?" Percy asks glaring at him. Octavian turns to glare back at him.

"You do realize that she's right there." He snaps, gesturing to me without glancing to me. My face heats up at what Percy said. Did Octavian really tell Percy that? Did he really care about me that much at one point?

"You do realize your being a selfish asshole right now." Percy retorts. I purse me lips to stop the words but they come out anyway.

"Just stop, leave him alone." The two glaring boys look over to me in shock "He doesn't have to write in the journal. Its pointless if he isn't fully engaged anyway. Besides, he's right, either way my memory will come back eventually." I tell them. I look to Annabeth. "I'll write in the journal, it'll be a good way to keep track of my memories, thank you." I tell her. She nods with a smile.

Annabeth and Percy leave shortly after that.

I walk into my room without a word to Octavian. I strip into sweats an a loose t shirt. I walk over to my bed and fall asleep before my head full touches the pillow.


	4. Chapter 4

The next day goes on very uneventful. Nothing exciting happens until Katie calls.

"Hey, Rachel. Me and Travis were just wondering if you wanted to come over to the youth center tomorrow and check out our work, maybe even paint a bit if you feel like it. Sounds good?" She asks. I smile widely.

"Yeah, that sounds awesome. Tomorrow?" I confirm.

"Yes, I'll pick you up at twelvish." She tells me.

"Cool, see you tomorrow." I tell her. We hang up and I smile. I turn only to see Octavian right behind me. I jump in surprise.

"Who was that?" He asks before walking past me and grabs an apple from the bowl of fruit I put out.

"Katie, she invited me to come by the youth center tomorrow and check out the work we've done and maybe paint a bit." I tell him.

"Cool." He bites into his apple. "Do you need a ride?" He asks after he swallows. I think for a moment, slightly off balance by how easy this conversation is going and yet I still feel like I'm on a tight robe above a bit of snakes. I shake me head after a moment remembering Katie.

"No, thanks, Katie said she would give me a ride." I tell him. He nods and continues his apple.

'Have you looked at your art studio yet?" He asks. I shake my head and walk over to the door. I open it and see that its over flowing with paint, brushes paper and canvas. A memory flows through my mind. I'm sitting on the bench in front of me, painting the out lines of a giant forest. I look around until I see it, A forest, its not finished but when it is I can tell its going to look amazing. The memory continues. I remember feeling two warm arms wrapping themselves around me and feeling a rush of joy at the feeling. It's Octavian.

He looked at my out line I was painting and he looks to me with concern. He stands at my side well I still sit. "Is this really helping you?" He asked me unsurely. Gilt and shame over whelmed me when I looked down.

"I... It- I just miss it." I told him. Octavian got on his knees beside me. He takes my hand and squeezes.

"I know you do. We're better off now, we're making a life for ourselves, a good one." He insured me. I'm quite for a long period of time.

"Do you still think we did the right thing? That what we did wasn't pointless, it was worth the pain?" I asked him, looking into his sad pale eyes. He slowly nodded.

"Well the fact that we're still here, together speaks for its self doesn't it?" He tells me.

"But, I abandoned them, They needed me and I betrayed them, I-" He cut me off.

"No, they abandoned you, they needed you and they turned their back on you, Rachel- I" He ran out of words and instead he leaned in. Oh god, the memory of that kiss. It felt amazing just thinking about it. When we had pulled away he looked me in the eye. "We are free here, there, we had to hind. Just think about that whenever you wonder if it was worth it, because to me, its more than worth it, just to be free with you." He told me before one more quick kiss. I smiled.

"I'm going to finish the painting, than It'll be sold for thousands and then, I know I'll be able to move on." I told him. Octavian smiled warmly to me. He nodded and stood up. walking away. Before he left he stopped and turned around. I looked over my shoulder at him.

"I love you, Rachel." he told me before he walked out of the room.

I stare at the door in front of me, that memory was a giant cliff, leaving me with thousands of questions. Who were we talking about? What did we do? And why is this forest so important?

I walk over to the bench and sit down, looking around, letting it all sink in. I've felt so happy in this room countless of times. I spent the rest of the day in the studio and draw and paint. I write down the memories I gained over the two days I've been awake it my journal and by night I'm eager to sleep and go to the youth center with Katie and Travis tomorrow.

But as I sleep, I gain more memories via my dreams. I'm in a helicopter, and it was crashing, into Manhattan, where a war of demigods and heroes is raging. Suddenly when I feel as though I'm doing to day, Annabeth and Percy come out of nowhere and help me.

Another is when I'm at a camp, camp half blood, the Greek camp, I'm sitting with Annabeth an Percy on the porch of one of the cabins. Suddenly Octavian walks by and I try not to look at him be he was taking off his shirt, switch was soaked, Travis and a boy that looks just like him snickering and Octavian, I assume they had something to do with Octavian being soaked.

He see's me staring and when Annabeth and Percy aren't looking he winks at me. I blush mildly. He nods over to one of the cabins. I scrunch my eyebrows at him and he looks over his shoulder, I follow his gaze and I see a lager group of teen that I don't remember, aside from Will and Kayla.

Octavian looks back at me with his eyebrows raised like he's asking me a question. I nodded and After he walks away I excuse myself from Annabeth and Percy. I walk over to the cabin Octavian had nodded to. I walk in to see that Octavian's the only one in there and is sitting on one of the many beds, his head resting on the wall behind him. He smiles when he see's me and I walk over to him. "Hey." He greets.

Before anything else happens I wake up to a knock on the door. I stand up and walk over to my bedroom door to see Octavian holding the phone. "Annabeth is on the phone for you." He tells me as he hands me the phone, I nod and thank him. I talk to Annabeth for awhile she tells me about thinks including my collage classes, my shifts at the cafe I work at with Piper and says that Katie and Travis can fill me in on my art work.

After I'm off the phone I eat an orange for breakfast and get dressed into jeans and a loose white shirt with a green tank top under. I grab my journal and fill in my memories I gained in my dreams. I look at my journal cover and realize its still blank. I grin. Just like my memory. I suddenly get a great idea for a cover.

I walk into the bath room and look in the mirror. I pull out the sharpies and do a small and quick self portrait. I'm sad to say that I'm still slightly hazy on my memory of my own appearance. I guess I didn't really spend to much time in front of the mirror.

Octavian walks past the bathroom and see's me before stopping and arching an eyebrow at from the frame of the door. "what are you doing?" He asks. I look down at the journal. Almost ashamed.

"I- I'm having some trouble remembering what I look like." I mutter. He steps into the bathroom and looks over my shoulder at my journal.

"What's the idea for the cover?" He asks.

"For every memory I gain, I add a small swirl or small design." I tell him, startled at the fact that he pushed past the memory lose and just changed the topic, I wonder if he did that for me. I think back to last night and what Percy quoted from Octavian. He admitted that half of the things he did before were for me. Did that really stop after the accident? Is he maybe still looking out for me?

He just nods, stepping closer to me, his chest almost brushing my back making me shiver. I take a green sharpie and make a little swirl next to my head in the corner. Than I add a yellow star. two memories. Then a red heart. Three. Then a purple swirl. Four. And than a blue swirl. Five

"Five memories." Octavian mutters. His voice low and close. I shiver.

"Yeah, not adding all the facts and names, just clear memories." I tell him. We just stand there for awhile. It takes me a good five minutes to realize that my hand is in his. I look over my shoulder at him.

"Rachel, would it be rude of me to ask... how many of those memories are of me?" He whispered. I stare at him. I blush slightly.

"Four of them." I tell him. Octavian turns me around to fully face him. He stares at me.

"Rachel, I really-" He's cut off by the door bell. the sound snaps me back into reality and I realize that we're only an inch apart at best. I blush and look to the door.

"That's Katie, I need to go." I tell him. He nods and steps back. I grab my journal and head for the door. Katie's there waiting with a small smile. I smile back. "Hey," I greet.

"Hi, lets go, our stuff is there already." I nod, but still bring my journal and sharpies. I slip on a pair of bright yellow, paint covered sneakers and walk out the door with Katie. Only after I'm out of the apartment I remember Octavian and turn to wave him good bye, but the door is already closed. As we walk down to the parking lot, Katie snatches my journal out my hands and looks at the cover. She frowns at it. She tells me she thinks its a little bare and I explain the purpose of the journal and the idea of the cover. She smiles and tells me she likes it.

We drive to the youth center in her organ beetle well listening to horrible pop music. When we get there I see how big the building is, its at least three stories. We walk in as she explains the theme of the building and how its supposed to be paintings of goals and good experiences that the teens here can look forward to without it being shoved in their face, that's why the theme is difficult, we had to make the art work look as an interesting enough to catch their attention without them rolling their eyes at who stupid the theme is.

"Hey! Reds back from the dead!" Someone wraps their arms around my shoulder. I look over to see a tall guy with brown hair and matching eyes smiling down at me. Who the hell is he?

"Um... who are you?" I ask, pulling away from him. His smile fades.

"Um, your boyfriend?" My eyes widen and I look to Katie who rolls her eyes and slaps the guy in the back of the head loudly. He cries out and ducks his head with his hands covering were she hit. Katie glances over to me, scrunching her nose and shaking her head.

"He's not, he's has sick humor." Katie tells me. I nod and we walk away with the guy trailing behind.

"So... Rachel, when did you get out of the hospital?" The guy asks.

"I don't know you and from our sick humor I can tell that I don't want to." i tell him over my shoulder. He makes a mocking cat call.

"I'm Garrett." He tells me.

"I didn't ask." I replied as we walk into a room filled with paint supplies where Travis is waiting. Some youths are with him, two girl's and one boy.

The girls have hair that must be toxic considering how artificial it looks, died and bleached improperly, most likely home done and their eyes looked like they had taken a black marker and just went crazy, but when they blinked I could see that they also used colorful markers on their eyelids to go with their outfits. They also had piercings all over the place, at least one on their lower lip, -but one had two on the lower and one on the upper- three for each ear and one for their nose. one of them laughs and I see a piercing on her tongue as well.

The boy had long shaggy hair that was bleached with a baseball cap to cover it. He had a pierced lip and an ear spike as well, his clothes were old and wrinkled and his jeans exposed half of his butt and were ripped at the knees.

Travis looks up and smiles, greeting us with a wave, we walk over and when the youths see me they go crazy.

"Red!" The girl with three lip piercings cries as she runs to hug me. I smile and embrace her, remembering how good this place is along with the people. I pull away and look over over hoping t find a name. It clicks when I stare up at her dark blue eyes.

"Hey Hope." I smile. I hug the girl with a tongue piercing and remember her as Emily. I turn to the boy who hugs me before I can place a name. He's the same height as me almost taller and smells like weed. "Cameron" He pulls away and smiles.

The kids hang around and talk with me well we watch Katie and Travis paint a super hero that's crashing into the ground. I ask about in and they tell me that on the next wall their going to have him standing up and waling away like a normal person and that the idea is that you don't have to be perfect, but you can at least try to succeed

I like that idea, it feels like I'm going to be going through that kind of thing. I just hope Octavian will understand that.


	5. Chapter 5

I'm talking to Emily about her nails and how she uses sharpies to do them when Travis stands from where he's sitting doing grass on the wall. "Hey, Red do you want to try to paint today?" He asks. I smile and eagerly nod. I walk away from Emily who snorts.

"Rude!" She teases. I smile over my shoulder.

"Talk to Travis." I tell her before grabbing a paint brush and sitting down and continuing the trail of grass Travis had began. Feeling he paint brush flow over the wall in flicks of grass feels so familiar and right. I smile as more memories slowly ease into my mind.

I remember painting a large brick wall. from the tingling I remember shooting through me I'm pretty sure I wasn't supposed to be painting the wall though. Percy was with me, drawing smiley faces all over the place. And that's it. Just me and him graffiting and having fun. I love that memory for some reason. It just makes me feel so content.

Another memory, I'm finishing a painting, just adding the clouds that surround a setting sun. I'm in a class room and the teacher looked over my shoulder and patted my shoulder saying that it was very good. Suddenly there was a tapping at the door of the class room and I look up to see Annabeth and Percy in the window by the down mouthing at me to come on. I smiled and excused myself and grabbed my bag before running off with them, probably to do something we weren't supposed to, judging by the adrenaline I had felt then.

I look over my shoulder up at Travis. "Is this good?" He nods. When I finish painting the grass I go to write down my memorise and add an orange star and a gray swirl. We stay and talk and paint for a while, The teens eventually leave and there's only the three of us now.

"So do you remember camp?" Travis asks. I smile and nod. He grins. "Yeah, its pretty hard to forget that place. Conner liked it so much he decided not to leave." Travis grins. I remember Conner, he's Travis's brother, the other one i saw in my dream. I smile.

"Really?"

"Yeah, but I'm sure that part of it is that he just want's a free place to eat and sleep... and prank newbies." Katie rolls her eyes.

"At least they don't have to deal with the both of you now." The two bicker at one another for awhile and I only listen. I'm painting a sidewalk now, trying to hold my tongue right and keep a straight line.

"Hey, its almost five, lets give it another ten minutes and clean up and go out to dinner." Travis suggests. We agree and after ten minutes we clean up. As we walk down stairs we run into Garrett.

"hey." He greets with a smile.

"Hi." Katie replies for us. I'm look away and read one of the posters. Before I can read it all the other's are walking and I'm following, Garrett with us now. I don't bother to ask why. I get into a car with Katie well Travis and Garrette go to their own cars. Katie drives us to a chain restaurant where Travis and Garrett are waiting and we walk in.

When we're seated Travis dives into a story about when he and Connor hijacked a school bus on a field trip. "...And then Connor was like 'I don't know how to drive stick' and I'm freaking out because we're going like what 25 miles? And the teacher- Haha- is on a bike going as fast as possible after us-"

"Wait how did he get the bike?" And with that Travis dives into another story. I laugh with the others and we go around the table telling stories and jokes well we eat.

"So hows it been with Octavian, Rachel?" Katie asks me. "He seemed stiff the other day."

"He's always like that!" Travis laughs loudly. Katie quiets him as we get a glare from one of the waitresses.

"Shut up, you'll get us kicked out you moron." She hisses. He waves her off with a snort. She looks back at me, waiting for me to answer. I fidget uncomfortably.

"It's good I guess, nothing bad." Except for the fact that he goes in between hating me, ignoring me and acting concerned and invested in me. "He's been helpful with my recovery, he told me about the camps."

"Camps?" Garrett asks confused. I stare at him for a moment before it hits me. Garrett isn't a demigod. Fuck.

"The camp they met at." Katie quickly fulls is. "And the other camp they both worked at over one summer, Rachel always said that those we're the best summer's of her life." I have no idea what she's talking about but don't butt in. Garrett looks at me.

"What about that summer we spent at your parents beach house? That was fucking sweet! Remember when we-"

"No I don't actually. I don't remember most things." I snap at him. He stares at me. His eyes suddenly hard and stony.

"You say that, but from the way you've been acting around me I'd say you remember more than you let on." He replies with a sour tongue. He stand up and pulls a twenty from his pocket, throwing it at the table and leaving. I stare after him in shock. What the hell was that? I look back at Travis and Katie looking for an answer but they are just as shocked as I am. I look down and excuse myself before walking out. Katie calls after me saying to wait for her outside and she would be out in a minute.

I step outside. I sit on a bench near the doors. I look around and silently beg for my memories. Katie walks out with Travis. Katie gives me a ride back to the apartment. I leave her in the parking lot and walk up to the stairs.

At the door I find that its locked. I purse my lips. What if Octavian's busy or asleep? Its not that late but still. Suddenly I remember where a spare key is. I walk down the hall over to a pretty plant, reaching behind it and feel for the small key. I unlock the door and walk in. I drop my back on the table before going back to return the key.

When I return and close the door behind m Octavian's in the kitchen. "Sorry that I locked the door." He mutters as he grabs some chips. He glances over to me. "You remembered the key. That's good." I don't have the energy to glare or comment of how oblivious he is.

"Yeah, its fucking great." I grumble as I walk into my room closing the door behind me. Octavian is at the door a minute later as I'm grabbing a pear of sweats and a t shirt. He knocks and I ignore it. Then the door opens.

"Get out here." He tells me. I stare at him.

"Why?"

"Because I told you to." I glare at him

"Do you know how sexest that sounds?" he rolls his eyes and grabs my wrist. He drags me out and throws me onto the coach with a flick of his hand. I wish I wasn't so small and weak right now. I bet if he had tried to do that before the accident I wouldn't have gone down so easily. I stare up at him, my mouth fallen in shock of his actions. How fucking dare he!

"What the hell is your problem?" I strain myself. He stands in front of me burying his face into his hands.

"Dear gods... You! You've been nothing but an obstacle sense you got here! I have to spend my day tip toeing around you! You never want to engage with me, you act like you're scared of me... And than I get yelled at by Annabeth and Percy." I glare up at him. I stand up and face him.

"What do you expect? You're like a fucking scare crow. Looming over me than snapping or just shutting down at the dumbest things! So what if I could only remember one of our millions of music debates? It was my first day. And this morning, what the hell was that?"

I'm scared of the fire in his eyes, but luckily it seems to fade when I mention this morning. He stares down at me sadly. "This morning was me trying to cling to something I don't have anymore." He muttered. He turns to walk away but I follow him.

"What do you mean?" He looks at me with sad eyes.

"Never mind, I'm sorry I yelled at you. This whole recovery of memory is just getting on my nerves." He tells me. "Its so fucking frustrating! All I want is for things to be normal again." He stares at me like its my fault. But I quickly realize that it is my fault. I messed things up.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled. He huffs and waves me off.

"You couldn't have stopped it. You were hit by a drunk driver. The asshole got out of it with only a broken arm." He mutters. He walks over to the kitchen. He retrieves his chips that were still on the table. He looks back at me.

"You want to watch a movie?" I almost laugh.

"Are you serious? We were just yelling at each other and you just flip the switch like that?" I ask. He shrugs.

"Yeah, That's just me." He tells me, grabbing a beer. A stare at him for a moment before smiling and join him in the living room. He grabs a movie and shows it to me. "Stranger than fiction."

"Great story." He tells me before putting it in. I smile and sit in the comfy seat I've grown attached to. We watch the movie, about a quarter way through Octavian tosses the bag of chips to me from the couch. I smile and eat a few before tossing the bag back. I look across the room at the cluttered corner and study it for a moment books, movies and papers are piled up on something, it takes me a moment before I realize its a piano.

"Who lays the piano? You or me?" I ask.

"You." He grins, not looking away from the movie. "Before you started selling your art you would play the piano at fancy parties." I giggle when he wiggles at the word fancy.

"What do you do for a living? You never told me." He glances over to me.

"I'm electrician, well kinda, I set up the plans for buildings. I make animated models and blueprints. stuff like that. I do allot of my work from my laptop here. But soon their going to be having me come into the office and on sites for upcoming projects." He tells me. I nod. We continue to watch the movie in silence. After the movie ends I go to bed.

"Good night." He calls after me. I look back and smile.

"Good night."

That night I remember more.

I'm in a cave at camp half blood. My cave. I'm painting and smiling. But suddenly something grabs my shoulder and I scream, whipping around and throwing my paint brush at the person who cried out.

"What the hell!" A voice snaps. I look and see a young Octavian, holding a hand to his eye.

"Oh gods! I'm so sorry! You scared me!" I cried, rushing over to him.

"You got paint in my eye." He whines.

"Come on, I'll take you to the infirmary."

"It's not that bad." He grumbles.

"Stop whining." I tell him and take him to the infirmary and clean his eye with disinfectant. "I'm Rachel." I tell him as I clean his eye. He grins.

"Octavian." He tells me. "I'm a Roman." I smile. and tug on his shirt.

"I noticed." He lets out a huff of a laugh. I finish up his eye and his eyes both open up, very close to mine. I gulp. "You have pretty eyes." I mutter. He laughs.

"Are you hitting on me?" I laughed and leaned back.

"You? Please! I think I could better than a kid who had to go to the infirmary because he got paint in his eye." His eyes widened.

"You dragged me here!" He cried. I laughed at him and look around not sure what to do with myself. He seemed in the same state. "So... would maybe be able to give me a tour?" He asked. I smile.

"Are you hitting on me?"

Before the memory continues I wake up. I look around and see that its only like three in the morning.

"Crap."

**Sorry for this weak chapter guys, and that it took forever.**


	6. Chapter 6

I wake up late the next day. I quickly get dressed and walk out of my room. Octavian's in the kitchen reading a book. I walk up to him and read the cover. "To Kill a Mockingbird"

"Is it any good?" I ask sitting across from him. He arches an eyebrow.

"Are you kidding." he mutters. I'm confused.

"What?" He shakes his head.

"Its a very famous book."

"That doesn't mean its good." I state. He stares at me, willing me to continue. "Just because somethings famous, doesn't mean its good. like People, Hitler is famous, but sure as hell isn't good."

"It depends on how you look at it." He mutters. My eyes widen.

"Hitler?" Octavian quickly scowls at me.

"No you idiot, famous things, even good things. Good things can be bad things."

'That's what I'm saying."

"And I'm agreeing."

It goes quiet for a while. Octavian gets up and walks into the living room. He comes back with a book. He hands it to me. I read the cover. "The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane" I look through it, it has beautiful images every second chapter. I look up to Octavian.

"It looks like a kids book, or at least lower level." I state.

"Its your favorite book. You said you read it when you were ten, it made you love reading." He tells me. I nod. and stare down at the book. I study one of the paints.

"This images are so beautiful." I mutter. Octavian says nothing and just continues to read his book. I fill to the first page of the book in my hands and begin to read. And that's how I spend my day, reading my book. I quickly understand why this was my favorite story. The character development is amazing I finish the book by five. I look up very few times, to check the time of watch as Octavian comes by.

When I jut down the book after finishing the book, Octavian comes up was he pulls a jacket on over his hoodie. "Hey, I know you went out with Katie and Travis for dinner yesterday but do you want to go out for dinner at a pub I found the other day?" He asks. I nod and rub my eyes before tying my hair up and grabbing a sweater. We leave and drive in his car for about ten minutes before arriving at a bar, or as Octavian calls it a "pub". Whatever.

He opens the door for me and sit at a table, we're served by a happy girl not to far from our age. I smile up at her with ease. Her brown hair was straightened to a point but there wasn't a speck of make up on her pretty face. "Hi, I'm Amanda, I'll be serving you today."

Octavian orders us fries to start. He's about to order drinks before glancing at me and back at Amanda. "Can you hold on the dirks for a sec?" He asks. She nods with a smile and walks off. He looks back at me. "Do you know if you can drink? You know, did they say anything about it?" He asks. I think for a moment and shake my head.

He then pulls out his phone and calls someone. "Hey Blondie." I send him a glare knowing he's talking to Annabeth. He just rolls his eyes at me and smirks. "Can Rachel drink now, or should she wait awhile?" He pauses and listens to Annabeth's reply before scowling. "Shut up." He grumbles. He listens again before saying good bye and hanging up.

"She said its cool for you to drink, but nothing more than like one beer." he says. I shake my head.

"Its fine, I don't want a beer anyway." I tell him. He nods.

"You can always have some of mine." He mutters. I only nod. The atmosphere in the bar is nice, I feel calm. I tap my fingers on the table When suddenly Octavian's hand covers mine. I look over to him, he studies me. I flatten my fingers against the table, He must want me to stop.

"Sorry." I mutter. I purse my lips thinking of something to say. "I um, I remembered how we met last night." His eyes flash.

"Really?" I smile softly, liking the brightness that seems to have entered him. I nod.

"But I only remember it up to the part where you asked me to give you a tour." His face suddenly flushes.

"I'm not sure if that's a bad thing or a good thing." he laughs nervously. I'm intrigued by this know, what could have happened for him to blush like that?

"What happened?" I doesn't tell me and I nearly beg. He laughs and scratches the back out his head.

"Well... Before I tell you I have to set a few things straight." He tells me looking into my eyes with a dead serious look in his eyes but a boyish grin on his lips. I nod willingly He sighs.

"Um... do you remember why you were at camp half blood?" He asks. This catches me off guard. I think for a second before I bow my head and shake my head. He sighs again. "It's okay, you were the oracle." he tells me in a soft voice. My head shoots up.

"that's right." I breathe, a smile cracking across my face as memories of camp and guy friends pretending to hit on me. Octavian's grins doubles in shine.

"Okay, now, you have to understand; You were fifteen and I was sixteen." I nod. "You were extremely nice to me, you know after you threw paint in my eye." I laugh. "You, were hot!" Now we're both laughing.

"I'm not sure where this is going." I tell him. He rolls his eyes.

"Yes you do!" He grins. "Anyway, I thought you were into me, and lastly," He looks around and leans in close over the table and do the same with a grin. His eyes lock with mine. "i didn't know you were the Oracle." He whispers. I purse my lips and smile.

"So what did you do?" I whisper with a smirk. He purses his lips.

"I tried to kiss you." He finally tells me in the softest voice I've ever heard. The atmosphere changes and I watch as Octavian's eyes flicker to my lips. On reflex I lick my lips.

"Octavian," I whisper.

"Yes?" He replies.

"Are you going to try to kiss me again?" I whisper, my voice shaking at the end. His eyes blot back to my eyes in alarm. He seems to just have realized what he's doing, his mouth opened in a moment of shock. I remember that look, from a moment in time, an important moment, but I can't remember it. I look down and Octavian leans back in his seat. I do the same.

"I'm sorry." I whisper. He shakes his head.

"No, its something you would usually do." he mutters. I nod and our food comes. Suddenly something crosses my mind.

"Wait, if I'm the Oracle, how were we..." Octavian looks up at me with a sad gaze. His hand slips across the table, holding mine. Why is he acting so different? He was so stiff before dinner.

"Rachel, you know how at your coming back party, I took you to the side, and explained everything in the room." I nod. "Well, I want to do that now but I think if we both leave they'll think we dined and ditched." He whispers. I look down at our plates, the food has been barely touched.

"Looks more like a no dine and ditch." I mutter. Octavian shakes his head.

"We'll talk at home. I promise." He says stiffly. I shake my head and stare at him in discussed awe, pulling my hand away.

"Wow, your amazing at that whole hit the switch thing." I glare. He stiffens and shrugs.

"Its what I do, you're not too bad yourself." he retorts.

"Well I had help." I state. We finish our dinner in silence. The ride back is pin drop quiet.


	7. Chapter 7

When the door opens I storm into the apartment. I whip around and glare at Octavian.

"Okay, now tell me." I demand. Octavian stares at me long and hard. Suddenly he jumps at me, pushing me up against the wall, his lips only an inch from mine. I stare up at him in shock. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" I stutter. He just stares down at me. He leans closer.

"Rachel..." he whispers. "Can I kiss you?"

I stare up at him in complete shock. That's so fucking familiar! I shove him away. I glare at him.

"What the fuck is your problem! Stop trying to mess with me! Tell me what happened! Why did the Oracle have you as a boyfriend?" I demand. Octavian stares down at me. His eyes sad and frustrated.

"You want to know what happened? We fell in love, simple. Now good night." He turns around and slumps onto the couch. I follow him.

"I can't believe you!" I yell at him. "Why do you act like this! No one can go from nice and sweet to a total asshole." I glare down at him. He stares at me with a stone face. I stare at him, he was so nice earlier. "You say we were in love? I have a hard time seeing that from the way you treat me." I glare down at him. He slowly sits up.

"Shut up." He growls. "You don't know what your talking about."

"Yes I do! You've treated me horribly, aside from the few times you didn't talk to me with a scowl on your face, you've been fucking oblivious to me!" I feel tears as I let out my frustration. "How could I ever love someone like you!" I finally snap before seeing that I've gone to far, the hurt in his eyes say it all.

"I don't know." He mutters before walking into the bathroom and slamming the door behind him. I stare after him, I walk up to the bathroom door and knock on it.

"O-Octavian? I'm sorry, i didn't mean it, I was just so mad that I was looking for any mean thing to say, I'm so sorry. Please come out." I wait for a few moments before I finally hear it.

"Fuck off." I look down. a tear tastes bitter as it seeps into the corner of my mouth, only now I realize that I'm crying.

In bed that night I regain two memories.

I was walking around the camp with Octavian.

"So this is the beach, isn't it beautiful?" I asked him. He smiled and nodded. I lead him all over the place and then finished the tour in the forest.

"I love the forest, I could paint every tree and nymph if I could." I told him with a huge grin. Octavian smiles.

"Yeah it really is awesome. Thanks for the tour, Rachel, I had a lot of fun. You're a cool chick." He told me. I blushed and nodded.

"Thanks, you're cool too."

"I know right!" He smirked, making me laugh. He stepped closer. His smirk calming down into a cool and confident smirk that gave me shivers. "Could you please double check my eye, I think I still have paint in there." He mutters.

I gasped mockingly. "You think I could be so thoughtless as to leave paint in your beautiful eye?" He chuckles.

"You think my eyes are beautiful?" I didn't hesitate to nod my head.

"Yep, jaw dropping."

"How nice of you." Suddenly he was right in front of me. I blushed and realize that he's gesturing me to check his eye. I giggle and bring my hands to the sides of his face and hold him still as I look into his eyes. Beautiful.

"There's nothing there but your pretty eyes." I muse. Suddenly his hands come up to my hips and I have to stop myself from jumping. Octavian's breath blowed in my face. Our eye were still locked.

"Rachel," He breathes. I was trembling. "Can I kiss you?" My jaw drops. He begins to lean in but I push away.

"N-no. You can't." I mutter. Octavian's face drops. He looks down at his feet.

"I'm sorry." He muttered before turning to walk away.

"Octavian," I follow him. "Its not because I don't like you, I- its just that I can't be with anyone, ever." He looks at me confused. I bite my lip.

"I'm the Oracle." His eyebrows went sky high.

"Okay... you really didn't think that was an interesting character trait to being up on first introductions?" He asked. I just shrugged. We stood there in uncomfortable silence until Octavian sighed and offered me his had with an easy smile. "Friends?" I grinned and grabbed his had.

"Best." I reply.

The memory fades away and another begins.

Octavian and I are in our apartment and are fighting, loudly.

"Why can't you just understand!" He yelled at me from across the bed. We were in the bedroom, the bed seeming to be the only thing keeping us from jumping at one another.

"You're making this so much more complicated than it has to be!" I reply "Your asking me to stop bringing in money or stop trying to get a better future for us! Just so I can be a pretty little pretty house wife for you!" I scream the last words. He glares at me.

"Like I would ever want you as a wife." He growled. I stare at him with hurt disgust.

"You're no prize either." I yell.

"You think I want to fight like this! Rachel We barely see each other we're so can't you just take something off your plate so its easier!" He exclaimed. "Why do you even need to go to collage anyway? You already have two promising career paths in front of you."

"Oh yeah! Like a being peniost or an artist makes a good living!" I snapped.

"I thought they were your passion!"

"Art is yes, but if you listened just once to me after a penio gig, you would now how much I hate it! I only like playing music for my friends and family. But no, you just hug me and say I was great and ask about the next gig!"

"I'm just trying to encourage you! Its not like you give me much encouragement!"

"What do you want encouragement on? Your job? Whenever I asks about it you say there's nothing worth talking about!" I yell. Octavian raised ihs arms and lowered his head and opened his mouth like he was about to yell.

"Why are you so Fucking stupid, Rachel! How did this even get to my job! Just drop out of school!"

"No! I worked hard to get into NYU! And don't tell me to quit my job at the cafe because that's what's keeping me in school!"

"Then drop both!"

"NO!" I screamed. I stand there and glare at him for another moment before storming out into the living room, slamming the door behind me and I sleep on the couch thinking about the worst part of the fight.

I left my pillow.

In the morning of the fight I wake up to a stiff back and the smell of bacon. I opened my eyes to see a coffee right in front of me on the coffee table.A note leaning against the cup.

_I'm sorry,_

_I love you_

it reads. I sit up and look over my shoulder. Octavian's standing over the stove with his back to me. I bit my lip and smile. I stand up and walk over to him, wrapping my arms around him from behind. Octavian stops what he's doing and just stands there as I rest my head on his back.

I wake up for real this time. I know what I have to do.


	8. Chapter 8

I tip toe out of my room and start the coffee maker. I grab a piece of paper and write down a note for Octavian.

_I'm sorry,_

_I remember._

I hope he understands that it means something. I look over my shoulder at the couch where he's still sleeping. It's seven in the morning. I place a cup of coffee and the note in front of him on the coffee table and turn around to grab some strawberries from the fridge. I clean them in the sink and pull out a bowl, placing some paper towel in the bowl and then placing the strawberries in the the bowl as well. I turn around to sit at the table but stop short when I see Octavian standing in front of the table holding the cup of coffee and note. I blush and look away from his analyzing eyes. He suddenly gives me a grin/smirk. He raises his cup to me.

"Thanks for the coffee." He mutters before taking a sip. I look down at my bare feet and press my lips into a straight line as I smile. I listen to Octavian put down his cup and feel his heavy footsteps as he comes closer.

I look up and grin fully up at him. He returns it. I lean against the counter behind me, placing the strawberries behind me, using my hands to prop me up. Octavian comes right up to me. He towers over me, his hands coming up to support him on the counter by mine. I smirk up at him.

"That wasn't the only memory I gained last night." I tell him. He grins.

"Care to share?" He whispers huskily. I giggle.

"'Can I kiss you'? Really?" I laugh. Octavian stares down at me.

"Can I?" He mutters. I stare up at him in surprise. I grin and lean up closer. He must really want this because his eyes eagerly flutter. I almost feel bad. Just before our lips are brushing I whisper.

"Get a new line." I lean back and smirk as his eyes snap open. I giggle and grab a strawberry. Octavian rolls his eyes.

"You just love to ruin the moment." He mutters.

"Well you have bipolar mood swings." I retort. He grabs his coffee and shrugs.

"Guilty." I smile and walk into my room, changing into jeans and a loose t shirt. I come out and see that's Octavian's on the phone. "... Yeah that sounds good. I'll be there by ten." He hangs up and looks to me. "I need to go into work to sign off on a project. I'll be back my five." I nod and he goes to get ready. What am I going to do for the rest of the day? I could go out and walk around the block for awhile. Maybe go get more food or call Annabeth. Octavian leaves and I wander around the apartment trying to decide what to do with myself until I just decide to go for a walk.

The walk burns about two hours of my day away as I admire the buildings and shops around the apartment. I get a few groceries and do other boring adult stuff, as I do I think about how much it sucks that I can't even remember what it was like to be a kid. Back at the Apartment I eat some veggie cracker things for lunch and prepare to watch a couple hours of movies when theres a knock at the door. I get up to answer the door only to find Garrett at the door. He gives me a charming smile. "Hey, Rachel."

"how the hell do you know where I live?" I demand him. Garrett only shrugs and walks into the apartment, pushing past me.

"I came to say sorry for what happened at the restaurant." He tells me as he looks around. "you have a nice place Rach."

"What was up with that scene you had?" I really don't feel safe with this guy. He chuckles.

"Unresolved issues." He tells me simply. The air between us is thick and uncomfortable. I look away from him and I hear him sigh when I do.

"Would you like something to eat?" I offer. He shakes his head.

"You probably think differently now that you lose your memory." He states. "You don't have all of those old memories to help shape your decisions in life and what you do." He continues, I purse my lips as he flirts with possibly voicing my fears. Its quiet for a long time, I refuse to look at him as he stares at me.

"Well I should go, Its bad enough i came without warning, now I'm wasting your time, sorry." he tells me as he moves to the door. But before he leaves he decides to speak again even though I wish he wouldn't "Don't worry about being different, things happen for a reason." For some reason my heart crushes at his words and his tone. I only nod and he leaves. I don't watch a movie, instead I pull out my journal and flip to the middle of the book and write down in the middle of the first page. "Things happen for a reason." A couple of hours later Octavian comes home, When he enters the apartment I'm in my art studio. He knocks on the door. I answer it and look up at him.

"Yeah?" I ask.

"How was your day?"

"Good."I reply curtly, not really wanting to talk. He seems to pick up on that and left. I try to push Garrett out of my mind and focus on painting but when I paint I paint a crying boy that gives me that sad feeling I had when he left only stronger. I quickly leave the studio looking for anything to get my mind off it. As i whip open the door Octavian is coming down the hall and we collid. He steps back about to apologize but I follow him and grab onto his shirt, looking for something to anchor me. He freezes as I stand there gripping his shirt, silently asking him to stay close, I stare down at his shoes, my eyes mist and I hurl my head into his chest. My misting eyes making his shirt slightly damp as cries that aren't my own echo through my head, what is happening?

Octavian wraps his arms around me hesitantly. The cries get louder and I gasp out. trying to form words but the cries boggle my mind. The cries begin to from words, _Help! Rachel Please help me! Please! Help! _I cant take it any more and let out my own cry that chokes out of me like the sound of a dying animal. I fall to my knees silently begging for the cries to stop, Octavian lowers himself down to his knees with me and says nothing, just holding me close as the cries slowly blur in my mind and fade away.

He strokes my hair and shushes me until I calm down. I realize that Octavian's turned himself into a human shield, protecting me from the screams he can't hear. I slowly pull away. He looks down at me not the way a lover looks to a lover or the way a parent looks to their child, but the way a partner looks to a partner, where the unwavering concern and trust make an odd mix but comforting gesture. As if he's saying, I'm right here behind you, following your every step and ready to catch you when you fall.

"I-"

"Its okay." He says gently. Ten minutes later I find myself at the kitchen table writing down in my journal as Octavian cooks us dinner. The news is on the TV in the living room. "So," Octavian starts. I look up at him, he has his back to me as he hunches over the stove. "Do you want to tell me about what happened or are we just going to forget it?" I playfully glare at the back when he plays with the word 'forget' I shake my head.

"I don't know what it was. Maybe the devil has possessed me." I hear Octavian let out a small chuckle.

"Alright, if you gain memory of it please update me, I'm dying to know what made you grab on to me and silently beg me not to tell go of you." He winks over his shoulder. I roll my eyes.

"You'll be the first to know." We end up having stew for dinner, Octavian saying that he hopes I remember to cook soon, bashing his own cooking skills which I think are fine but I'm just guess he doesn't like cooking to much. We put in a movie and have a calm evening. In the end Octavian is pasted out on his "bed" that being the couch, I feel bad that he has to sleep on the couch, maybe I should look into finding somewhere else to put my art so that he can have his own room, or maybe offer to let him sleep in my bed well I sleep of the he could just sleep in your bed with you, a voice in the back of my head calls.

I ignore it and go to bed planning to call katie tomorrow about finding a place to rent out as an art studio.


	9. Chapter 9

In the morning Octavian is eating breakfast when I get out of my room. He nods to me in greeting, I smile. He tells me that he'll he working until six to day and that he'll bring take out for dinner.I nod and go along with this plan, its nine now so I have nice hours to search for a place to rent today. When octavian leaves for work I call Katie and tell her my predicament and she eagerly agrees to help me saying she knew a great place that she used for an art studio. A half an hour later she picks me up and we go for coffee before heading to the place she suggested. We go to the cafe that Piper works at and are greeted by a beaming Piper.

"So this place basically an old warehouse that they divided into a bunch of rooms that people rent out for work or storage, rent is cheap and the owners super nice, I bet if you tell him why your renting a room out and how its so Octavian can have a room, he'll just love you, he's like santa claus." Katie tells me and I start to get excited. Piper and I also talk about me maybe picking up a shift at the cafe, just for some extra cash and a way to pay for the rent at the warehouse.

At the warehouse I almost instantly find a room I want, with a big window that looks over the streets of New York. Katie was right about the owner, he's just... jolly, that's the only word that does him justice, He has a bright smile that lights up the room, when we chat he tells me about his wife and his two children that are fully grown and both have children who he and his wife babysit. I can't help but smile around him. By one I have a room with my name on it and ready for me to move into. Katie calls Travis and Percy and the three of them help me move about half of my art supplies into the warehouse. We plan on moving the rest tomorrow and Percy offers me the bed from his and Annabeth's spare room for Octavian's room and promises to take me shopping tomorrow for a dresser for Octavian if I bye them dinner tomorrow night.

By the time Octavian gets home everyone is got and I'm alone watching tv. I look over my shoulder at him."Hey, how was work?"

"Boring, but at least they pay me."He replies. I smile when I see him set down a bag of when smells like chinese. We eat and octavian goes on about one of his work mates. "It was like he was stoned or something, the idiot nearly got himself and two others killed, he was just wondering around well these two other guys were trying to get his attention because they were repairing a circuit... Anyway the guy was a moron and he got fired."

"Awesome story, very up beat." I comment. Octavian only snorts at his plate.

"So what did you do all day?" He asks. I shrug.

"Just hanged out here, talked to katie on the phone for awhile. Are you going to work tomorrow?"

"Yeah, sorry. I'll be at work for the next couple of the days, they need me present for a bunch of meets and shit." He tells me. I nod, secretly overjoyed, If things go right tomorrow I can have his room ready for him by the time he gets home tomorrow.

"Rachel?" I glance up at him curiously. He looks a little nerves. "Do want to go out for dinner tomorrow?" I smile widely at him until I remember that I promised Percy to get them dinner tomorrow.

"I'm sorry, but I made plans with Percy, Katie and Travis for dinner tomorrow. You can come if you like." I tell him. He looks disappointed.

"No its fine." Hed waves my offer off

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want to intrude."

"You're not, please come."

"I'm good, thanks though." It gets quiet and I feel bad for letting him down. Hopefully he'll change his mind tomorrow. I go to bed early and think about tomorrow.

I see fire, I feel the heat from a distance, I listening to the sickening crackling. I watch in horror as a large house burns to the ground. I screaming, begging someone to save the people in the house but its like no one can hear me.

Now I'm sitting at a large table with fine china in front of me. I feel umcomfirble as a man and woman stare at me.

"It's been so long sense you visited last Rachel," The woman tells me in a sweet ut hollow voice, the man says nothing.

"Yeah, sorry. I've been busy at camp."

"About that camp of yours," She cuts in. "Do you really think that's any way to make a good living?"

"Well it's a year round camp and the people are nice... but that doesn't matter anymore, I'm looking for a new job and a place to stay."

"Why don't you just stay here?" The man grumbles.

"I don't want to impose on you guys, you're both very busy people."

"Don't be silly, this is your home!" The woman exclaims like I should know better.

"I... Okay, thank you."

Now I'm running down the halls of a giant house, I'm smaller and everything looks so big. I giggle and burst through one of the doors, The man from the large table is sitting behind a desk looking down at some paper. I giggle in delight when I see him. "Daddy! Daddy! Daddy! Look at what I made!" I cry in a high pitch voice. I run over to him . Sighs and puts on a big fake smile.

"What did you make princes?" He asks. I hold up a piece of paper with a drawing of a dog on it. "Wow! That's great sweety!"

"Can I hang it up in your office?" I ask him.

"Of course! let me get you some tape and you can stick it to the wall." He tells me. I squeal happily.

Now I'm walking into a kitchen where a woman stands. "Hey, do you know where my mom or dad are?" I ask her.

"Their out." She says shortly. I glare at her.

"Do you know when they'll be back?"

"They'll be back when they decide to come back." She replies. I roll my eyes.

"I'll just call my mom." I declare as I grab my phone and dial a number. I hear the voice of the woman from the large table when she answers.

"What?" She asks hastily.

"Hey, mom."

"Rachel, me and your father are busy." She hisses.

"I just wanted to know-"

"Good bye, Rachel." With that she hangs up. I nearly break into tears, wondering way my parents were always like that to her now.

Now I'm in a car with both of them, we ride up to a house. My dad looks up through the window at the house with a smile. "Home sweet home." I look at the house. Its the same house I had seen before, the one that was burning to the ground.

.Finally I'm standing in front of two graves. Octavian is beside me holding my hand. I feel sick, because all I can think of is how my parents treated me.

I wake up crying, sobbing loudly. "No! Please gods no!" I beg through my sobs. Suddenly Octavian is at the door. He says nothing but comes to my bed and piks be up in his arms. "No, no. Please no!" I sob

"Shhh, its going to be okay." Octavian whispers.

"They're dead! No, please no, please, they can't be dead!" I cry.

"They are, but its okay, Rachel its going to get better, I promise. Just please calm down and everything will get better." I continue to sob in his arms until I've run out of tears and my throat has gone dry. Octavian leads me out into the kitchen where he makes us some tea.

"I'm sorry, Octavian."

"Its okay, you used to have dreams about them like that before, you used to wake up screaming until I calmed you down."

"I can't believe I never thought for a second about them, I never wondered why my parents weren't there at the hospital or why I never saw them after was like they didn't exsit until now"

"Well I'm surprised you remembered this soon, before they died you never talked about them or to them and after they died you never mentioned them ever unless you had a nightmare. You didn't even go to their funeral, I had to make you go to their grave"

"Woah" I mutter. Octavian hands me a cup of tea and sits beside me. He looks at me but I only stare at his cup. His lips make one straight line like he's not sure of what to say. He reaches over and takes my hand into his.

"You know, I haven't been every nice or hopeful." He tells me. I shake my head.

"It's fine, this is frustrating and you shouldn't have to deal with this." I tell him.

"Yes, I do have to deal with it, because there's no way around it, I just had such high hopes in my head when you were in coma, that you would wake up and we would go back to living our lives, we just have to work our way back now I guess." I stare at him, I suddenly realize that He's been doing the same thing I've been doing. Hiding from a scary reality the reality that things with never be the same and that will never be the same person he loved.

Octavian sighs and shakes his head before looking back at me again. "I think we just need a different approach." He tells me.

"What kind of approach?" I ask him. He stares at me blankly for a few minutes as if he didn't hear me. Suddenly he reaches out and takes my face into his hand in a quick and fluid motion before pulling our faces together and pressing his lips to mine. I let out a squeak of surprise, this is certainly a different approach. My eyes flutter close as his lips move with mine. He pulls away for one moment before crashing his lips back down on mine making me gasp again. A warm feeling comes rushing through me, a familiar feeling that I love.

I'm not sure how long we sit there, lips locked together. Suddenly Octavian pulls away, his hands still cupping my face. He stares at me in shock which I'm sure I'm mirroring

"I'm sorry," He whispers, still holding me. I bring my hand up to lightly stroke one of his hands.

"Don't worry about it." I smile. He grins and kisses my forehead.

"You better get some sleep." He tells me. I only nod and walk into my bed room thinking about Octavian.


End file.
